Woh is me

I guess I better dig out some Vit D tablets, plan a sunny vacation, and possibly hit the tanning bed. These dark dreary skies and cold weather is kicking my butt into a funk. I really don’t like to complain because I know I have a great life, I created my current situations. I just feel like I am going through the motions.

Home–>work—->home——–> school—–>home—–> work and repeat.

Maybe I should of started selling those juice boxes 10 years ago when I was approached with the possibilty of making my own hours and endless money.

Ok enough complaining as I should be doing my school work anyways. Mindless internet play is such a better alternative though.


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I started in Endoscopy about 6 weeks ago. I was not really sure what I was getting myself into. I heard all the puns associated with the job:

  • that’s a shitty job
  • you really got the wrong end of the deal
  • I hope things come out ok
  • I bet you see a lot of asses

The list goes on .

Ok so the  point of my random rambling thoughts is that job is not that bad. I thought I might I be kind of bored once I got oriented, I believe I was wrong. Every day has been different cause everyone’s colons and stomach can be different. People always ask why the nurses and doctor would take a job dealing with colons. Since I have been in Endoscopy I realized how important the job really is. This week I was able to be in procedure rooms for a few days. At the beginning of the week I had a very young patient come in for a colonoscopy because something was seen on a CT scan. Once we got into her colon we found a mass. We potentially changed her life forever.

Later in the week my dad came in for a colonoscopy.  I was helping at the desk and saw pictures and went to put them in a chart, well it was my dad’s colon. AWKWARD! My dad’s colon was normal which was actually a great feeling. The possibility is always there.





<—- Diverticulitis


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I have been neglecting my blog due to school work, but I decided I needed to get back to it. Maybe it will be therapeutic to write about nonsense and destress.

I have been called a middle class label whore before. Which I guess I could agree with. There are certain products that I do enjoy and only buy. Well the same person that called me the middle class label whore worked at Aldi’s. Yup, you know who you are! I asked how the food was one day and she told me most products were great and how much money I could save. So one cold February Day (yup, I remember this cause it was freezing and it was just after the Superbowl) I went to  Aldi’s to get pepperoni and it was $0.39 for a bag.

So each time I went I bought a few more things trying stuff out. Fit & Active is a popular brand and I buy the popcorn, yogurt, cold meat, and snacks. I also buy fresh fruits and veggies. Seriously that bag of bananas cost $0.44 for the entire bag!

I buy meat: ground beef, chicken breasts, and ground turkey.

Eric picks on me but he LOVES the crackers, he does not want Ritz crackers anymore.

Amanda also picks on me but she Loves the honey wheat pretzels that I buy. I will give in and say I did buy shampoo and conditioner the night before she came to visit and it was ghetto of me. I was not feeling well and only wanted to stop at one place and wanted food to feed my guest. I do promise not to buy that stuff again. I do have limits, peanutbutter has to be JIF and I need my diet Pepsi.

I like that fact that you have to pay $0.25 for a shopping cart, but you get it back when you take your cart back. AWESOME concept, no shopping carts all over the parking lot.

I am getting use to using my debit card and paying the $1.00. They do not accept credit cards, which help to keep the prices lower due to no fees.

You have to bag your own food which is fine by me. I am picky I like certain things together. I rock my big thirty-one bag and it usually hold everything which is always a cart full. Quick shout out to thirty-one for the great big strong bag that allows me to only make one trip carrying on my groceries.

So today I went and spent $70.43  which was a fairly cheap for what I bought. My cart was about half way full and it had 3 packages of meat, frozen pizza, veggies, and a bunch of random toiletries (I will talk about this later in the week)

The aisles kind of annoy me, I know I am so weird. There is an odd number so it is awkward and traffic flows poorly sometimes.

The cashiers are always friendly, quick, don’t tell me their whole life story. <—- this happens to me at Tops almost every time. I so don’t care that you haven’t seen your dad in 10 years and that your boyfriend beat you up. I will say the people in the mornings 0730 ish are very nice and friendly. Also at Tops the people with 2 FULL carts with all name branded things spilling out the top using their food stamps card really effin piss me off. I also had a man in front of me tell the cashier that he did not have a tops bonus card cause he didn’t care how much his bill is “I don’t pay for my groceries anyways.” Well as you all know of course I said something, “Thanks ASSHOLE, I work 2 jobs because of people like you. Getting a fucking free bonus card and save me a few bucks.”

Well I am sure you are glad you know about my Aldi’s obsession now, sorry I wasted 2 minutes of your life reading this but maybe I will save you some cash money!

I will leave you with a picture of my favorite Aldi’s foods



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not a warrior flamingo any more

As most of you I made some big changes in my life. All happening at the same time. I am really questioning my decisions right now. School has got me down and out. I feel totally lost and really just dont give a fuck. It is totally my fault for getting so behind. The class is only 5 weeks, so procrastination is really not an option. I am not sure why I thought it would be different and I cant even explain how different. I know it is going to be hard and challenging, why wouldnt it be? It is Masters program! Duh, if it were easy more people would go. The thing is as I sit here practing my presentation I feel akward and uneasy. I really cant see myself standing in front of a class lecturing. So why I am going to school for my Masters in nursing Eductaion? Who the Fuck knows! I guess I thought it was better than nothing. I feel like the things I am learning dont fit my type of nurse I guess I want to be. I am hands on, thats how I learn. Theories are not going to get me anywhere. I must see and then do. I went to school for what seemed forever but my best education was D3 night shift, my co-workers were my mentors. I learned what real nurses do. So I guess I am getting to the fact that I am not sure I will be continiung my education. I feel like I would rather enjoy my life then sit stressing in front of a comupter, which by the way broke on Sunday sending  me into full panic mode, for hours staring at the same screen hoping by the grace of budlight something will make sense and an APA style paper will come flowing out.

Any thoughts?

So many fun things I could be doing on Wednesday nights instead of class:

  • trivia (see I could learn new things)
  • watching random TV shows
  • visiting family & friends
  • playing darts
  • flying a kite
  • reading a funny book
  • writing stupid blogs
  • shopping @ Aldi’s
  • watching a movie
  • running on the treadmill
  • talking to my mom

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things happen for a reason

I had a hard time getting up today and was not feeling it. I made it to work and was able to watch a few procedures, which was very overwhelming! There was a nursing student and she drove me crazy: asking stupid, YES stupid questions, and she touched me. I know no question is stupid but her first one was legit STUPID! I have so much to learn in the GI lab, it was a lot to take today.  I knew I would learn some new things but not this detailed. I like to learn new things but I will admit I feel a little in over my head this week with school and work. I can’t wait for that day when I feel like things have clicked and I feel more comfortable at work.

On the way home I got in a car accident on Madison Ave bridge. I am ok and the people in the other car are too! My front bumper needs replacing. Per Megan, “it was faded anyways”. I called the police and they were quick and filled out our paper work. The lady that rear-ended was so nice. We were both ok and it was an accident. The cop left after he got my license plate of the bridge for me and I broke down. Called my mom crying, I will always need my mom! My freak fest started early. I told my mom that I think I was going to quit school before I got too invested. I feel to overwhelmed with school, work, and change of hours. My mom talked me into going to class tonight and decide what I wanted to do after some more thought. I hurried home grabbed a drink and snack and took Eric’s car to class, crying to Eric and most of the way there.

Hence the title things happen for a reason. I am glad I went to class and it actually helped. I have a “friend”, where as last week I thought all the girls were clickie. I know most of them are but I do have someone now that’s a normal adult student. The teacher was there tonight, he had to miss the first class. I like him a lot. Something about him is all good!

Out lesson tonight was about change. How appropriate right?

Johnson’s Change Skills:

  1. anticipating change
  2. taking new action now
  3. moved beyond fear
  4. imaging real success

Be brave… it’s worth it!

I could actually relate this topic to my life. So please try to put up with me. I am working through a change process to become the best person I can be!


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night shift

D3 has been my home for the last 10 years. I did leave for a small stint on rehab but came back as soon as I could. I started at St. Joe’s back in August 2002. Angie got me the job. I had no hospital experience and worked as an per diem nurses aid. I learned on the job. I remember my first morning and some patient threw-up her eggs on me. Later that day a patient asked for a breathing treatment so I told the unit clerk to call (as that is what the nurse told me to do) inside I was freaking out. Why are people just hanging around, this person said he can’t breathe. I quickly learned if they are talking they are breathing. 2 years later I became an LPN and started full time on night shift.I worked with some of the best nurses, I learned so much! I have many stories good and bad but over all D3 has been my home. For the most part I would not change anything about the past 10 years, I have made some great friends and resources throughout the hospital. Working nights takes a “special” person and I can honestly say that the crew on nights at St. Joe’s is amazing.

Why I am writing all this? Well I got a new job. I am starting in the GI lab this week. This is totally out of my element which is really hard for me in the work setting. Most of my life I would like to think I am mostly outside the box trying new things but for some reason I have kept my work life the same. I am not sure why I decided it is time, but it is. I am excited to meet new co-workers, learn new nursing skills, and become part of the land of the living.

So I just wanted to say thank you to all the co-workers that I have come to admire, respect, and cherish our time together (good and bad). I have learned so much, Thank you!

Few random d3 moments:

“you can wipe your own ass”

“put pressure on your penis”

“I am sure it will not be the first or the last time someone poops in my face”

“working at the car wash…”


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Freak fest

Attention Everyone, I will be having a freak fest sometime at  the end of next week and the beginning of the following week. It is what it is! I have come to live with this and my family has too. I just wanted to remind people of this 3 week into school total break down. Every semester like clock work I would freak out in week 3 of school. I am sure this Masters adventure will be the same. I just feel overwhelmed with the work and lack of time and lack of availability I am to my family and friends. So please bare with me because I start new classes every 6 to 7 weeks, so I will be in freak fest a majority of the next 18 months. Oh did I mention I am starting a new job next week too. Yup day shift, which is scary as hell. I like the quite, decile, dark nights. Yikes, Lights, family, doctors, management, and 8 hour days. Oh no what did I get myself into.

I am a believer that things happen for a reason, I am on this path because I put myself there. I keep asking myself why did I do this to myself?

Someone reminded me that school is temporary but a new job title is forever. Thanks pal!


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